I get in or pull him out

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mr green
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Re: i get in or pull him out

Post by mr green » 22 Aug 2008

My god you must care for him. He is lucky to have you, all the best jan.

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jannisder
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Re: i get in or pull him out

Post by jannisder » 22 Aug 2008

Yeah, I do but obviously he don't give a sch-it.

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mr green
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Re: i get in or pull him out

Post by mr green » 22 Aug 2008

jannisder wrote:Yeah I do but obviously he don't give a sch-it.
No, he cares but he is fcuked up.

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Re: i get in or pull him out

Post by mr green » 22 Aug 2008

I have seen women swing out of Gyan much easier than it is for men and by this I mean the truly dedicated, which your man sounds like he is, it seems to be harder for the devout men to let go of it when they should. Men are more stubborn than women.

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tom
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Re: I get in or pull him out

Post by tom » 23 Aug 2008

Dear jannisder,

I would say, forget him before you get more hurt. Live your life.

With love and regards

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fluffy bunny
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Re: i get in or pull him out

Post by fluffy bunny » 23 Aug 2008

jannisder wrote:I have to became a Brahmin, if not ... forget the plans.
Well, I am sorry Jan. How did this come about?

The lucky brother has always been 'having his cake' and eating. I wonder if he will feel it if you go? Is not it always not about "Master and Servant" ... and is that not what the BKs subtlety and unsubtlety encourage? "Find your subjects" and make your devotees ... has this been his game plan all along?

Funnily enough, I have even heard of female center-in-charges playing the same type of game keeping members of the opposite sex hanging on ... for the "sake of service" and Baba, of course.

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jannisder
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Re: I get in or pull him out

Post by jannisder » 24 Aug 2008

OK, I shall write him a letter. Something like ... and help me out to get it all in place.

... My dear beloved, you want me to be a brahmin ...
  • So I have to??
    Live like??
    Act like??
    My friends and family will?
    My hobbyies??
    My spiritual life??
    My future??
    I can not??
My, my, my ... but what is left of my ambitious, cheerfully my ... ??

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Re: I get in or pull him out

Post by fluffy bunny » 24 Aug 2008

To be a good BK ... there should be no you left. Give your bones, crush your ego (identity), surrender your everything to the wisdom and guidance of Brahma Kumaris. And, remember what Dadi keeps telling us ... we have nothing more to think about, no more questions to ask ... just apply the full stop ... do not think any more. It is your salvation.

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Re: I get in or pull him out

Post by jannisder » 24 Aug 2008

OK ... check!!! ... thanks ex-l.

Everything is going to be in a letter. Before I send it, I give you all a check up OK? A copy of the letter. Although it is even more than private, I want to involve you to how this is going to end because all you were all there at the start.

You all warned me from the start but I held on ... and one by one ... it amazed me and I studied for the last two years ... beside Murlis, bk homework ... and everything else I tried to understand.

Because this is a love thing, it is hard to understand ... hard to understand why someone can ever get involved. I studied just about everything ... and I do understand why some get involved and it is so much harder to get them out? With my 24/7 intense study of Murlis, reports, articles, contact with most cult-exit experts ... I did myself some harm ... The final papers are in motion.

Love, to me, is an unconditional compassion, to nature and to man. I gave all I had, unconditionally, still there is upset??? What is wrong??? Because I am no more special to him than his dog ... Is it my ego??? Something wrong with me???

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Re: I get in or pull him out

Post by fluffy bunny » 24 Aug 2008

My only reaction is ... its a wonder they did not get him to get rid of his dog too. Pets are definitely NOT sattvic and not Shrimat.

Only time will tell, Jannisder, whether there is more to the Brahma-kumaris that collective "take". Whether there really is any collective "give" [beyond a few notable individual BK's efforts or short lived facesaving donations such as £20,000 out of a £2,000,000 annual revenue by the BKWSU (UK)] or whether the spirits behind it all are just another bunch of hungry ghosts giving as little as is required to reap as much as they can. Thank you for dropping by. I am sorry for what you have been through. You are a 'master BK' now. You know more about the BK than most BKs do!

If you are calling it quits, or putting it to the final test, I would suggest sending a copy with a covering letter to the local center, zone-in-charge and some other external authority that will make them have to read it to see what you have said about them, making your observations. The BKs are psychologically well very defended against any doubt or criticism ... but something will strike home and change them. Pick some United Nations, educational department or Interfaith organization to voice your personal and public concern of the Brahma Kumaris' conduct. Engage as many individuals as you can in the discussion. Given their world domination aims, everyone has the right to be part of it.

One of the greatest and most cruel farces the Brahma Kumaris engage in, is the denial of the cost of their vampiric religious ambitions to other families and individuals. Generation and generation of BKs. They know it. We know it. Just don't allow them ... like the mistresses of an unfaithful husband ... the satisfaction of being able to put your down as being "bitter". Think of every tricky accusation they might make and avoid giving them grounds to do so.l

70 years of broken relationships cutting away at the societies in which those individuals live in ... for what? A palace on a desert hill, a nice English Country Mansion, a few new agey retreat centers ... and the promise of gold and diamonds.

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Give and take

Post by joel » 24 Aug 2008

Hi Jan,

Most healthy relationships have an equality of give and take. That is, both partners listen to and adjust to each other. If one person is doing all the adjusting... well, that is what it sounds like is happening in your situation, and the person adjusting is you.

Which is not fair, since you have hopes and needs and feelings and dreams, too. Your dreams are not to be decorated with jewels and dancing in heaven, but are related to this time and place, whatever name we give to it, our world and our only opportunity for choice and fulfillment.

I am fully supportive of any decision you make for yourself, your life, your own health. When the relationship is unbalanced, it is up to the more mature member to take some action.

I am not sure I understand about your letter. Perhaps you prefer to write to him than to tell him directly what is behind your decision to leave off a relationship defined by your accommodating to him in one-way fashion. His beliefs and practices are apparently too rigid for him to reciprocate, except as suits him and his needs. You have certainly given him time and opportunities that he has not acted on.

I wish you all the best. I appreciate your intellect, frank and felt writings and your presence here

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Re: I get in or pull him out

Post by jannisder » 10 Sep 2008

How to break up with a bk.
Now that is something else.
He shall think, "well, its Drama".
Or see Baba is right ...
That is very depressing ... to know that there is no way to let him know that it is his BK created deluded mind breaking everything he has.

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Re: I get in or pull him out

Post by joel » 11 Sep 2008

jannisder wrote:How to break up with a BK. Now that is something else.
Is any breakup ever routine? I think most breakups are painful and crazy, the only possible consolation that staying together would be even more painful and crazy.

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tom
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Re: I get in or pull him out

Post by tom » 11 Sep 2008

joel wrote: I think most breakups are painful and crazy,
I agree with you joel.
jannisder wrote:To know that there is no way to let him know that it is his BK created deluded mind ...
In this pain of both of yours there is no need for talking or writing. If he understands he does by himself, later. Or maybe never.

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